Michael Vick Nike Endorsement

Michael Vick shoes will make you faster. He said so on this Nike Endorsement video. Not quite the other Mike, yeah? Gotta love Vick's pitbull terrier cameo, no? Obi-Wan Kenobi says "there is no disconnect here. Let Michael Vick be known for who he is."

Michael Vick, Nike endorsement, pitbull, Vick, Vick shoe, dog fighting, Michael Jordan

Afghan Suicide Bombing Chronology

An article that lays out a chronlongy of suicide bombings in Afghanistan is here. Would you agree that the pace of violence has increased in that country?

The "Surge" of U.S. troops seems to be working in Iraq, if standard sources are to be believed. The Clog Almanac warns that thinking that the war on terrorism is being won in that place may be a hasty judgement at best. Faced with sure defeat and destruction in Iraq, insurgent groups and individuals may in fact be doing what they have always done in those societies: melt away and regroup to fight another day, elsewhere. Iran must be walking a fine line since it's purported terrorist-support and nuclear development activities are under the international microscope. Perhaps the decline in violence in Iraq is related to Iran's decreased support of terrorism in that theater.

In the case of Iraq, insurgents who would otherwise be fighting and mounting suicide attacks may be looking for quieter venues in which to ply their deadly trade. They leave the battlefield, bombing and other incident stats go down, and the U.S. reports that the Surge is working. Maybe "it's working" because the enemy is quietly withdrawing. It doesn't take a genius to come up with a list of places where the U.S. and its allies are not concentrating their war, where terrorism and the advancement of enemy ideals might be less expected:

Some insurgent groups may be heading for Afghanistan, to join with the Taliban's push to gain influence. Others may be regrouping farther afield in places like Turkey, Malaysia, Indonesia, or certain African countries. Pakistan? Why not pile into that currently unstable country where tribalism and lawless border areas are the norm and where there are nuclear weapons within reach?

Calls for the beginning of the end of terrorism and international turmoil and violence are immature, in the Clog Almanac's opinion.

Wild Hog Sighting

The spate of absolutely gorgeous Fall days continues in north-central Florida. Yesterday I nabbed a shovelfull of native Fall-blooming sunflowers from a larger population on an out-of-the-way county right-of-way and transplanted them into my butterfly garden. This species, Helianthus angustifolius, the narrow-leaf swamp sunflower.

Today's drive home found me admiring the sunset when of a sudden I noticed 5 wild piglets snuffling around at the edge of a tree line bordering US 441 and wildlands on the NW side of Gainesville Florida near the City of Gainesville's Deerhaven power plant, operated by Gainesville Regional Utilities. The adult(s) were no doubt ensconced in the vegetation.

One morning last year I toured the 1400+ acres of wildlands associated with the coal-powered generation station that are part of a state-recognized "stewardship forest". That day I saw wild hogs, turkeys, white-tailed deer and a bobcat, and many local bird species. Kudos to the company foresters/land managers who are creating and maintaining a diverse mosaic of natural forest communities so wildlife can thrive so close to a growing urban area.

GRU, wild hogs, bobcat, coal-fired, power plant, Helianthus angustifolius, sunflower, Florida, wildlife

Alligator Munches Florida Car Thief

You've probably already heard the current "Only-in-Florida" story about the car thief who, despite warnings from alarmed witnesses, dived into a pond to elude capture by police, only to be captured by an alligator. Divers found his remains 50 feet below the surface. There is no punch line to this story, unless some clever reader supplies it via comments to this post.

Florida, Florida Gators, gator, alligator, stupid criminals, Miccosukee, Indian reservation, casino, resort crime

Alberto Gonzales - $40,000 Speaking Fee

Accent, a University of Florida student organization, is finalizing a contract to pay $40,000 to former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales to speak at an event on November 19, 2007. The free event is for both students and public alike. Gonzales, the grandson of (at least 3 of 4 grandparents) illegal immigrants, has no accent, by the way. Gonzales speaks English as well, and probably better, than you do, so don't spout that "he doesn't talk like us" crap). Oh, you don't like that, do you? My my. Speakers' fees are paid for by semester charges to students (or whomever pays the tuition and bills [MOM and/or DAD, no doubt]).

Totally aside, Sean Hannity, the captious pedant right-wing talk-show host was paid $75,000 for a similar appearance in Gainesville, FL. Again, the entertainers are paid more than the politicians. At the event Hannity took a jab at Hillary Clinton, saying that "It takes a village to satisfy my husband". If you've listened to Hannity before, you'd know you wouldn't put that sort of cheap shot above him. He doesn't spout this sort of thing on his radio and TV broadcasts because he knows that it is cheap blather unworthy of him and the advertising-sponsored networks on which he's franchised. He should know better.

Alberto Gonzales, Attorney General, Sean Hannity, Hillary Clinton, UF speaking fees speech, repuclicans, democrats, right wing, politics

Are You the "5th Guy"?

One in five don't practice good hygiene. Are you the 5th guy? You know, the one that doesn't wash his/her hands after using the restroom or changing the baby in the airport facilities? The one who sneezes and coughs on everyone in the staff meeting? The one who lets their diapered kids reach down their pants and then touch the restaurant table, shopping cart and drinking fountain handles or toys at the day care?

Meet your buddy The 5th Guy at his MySpace page.

The whole thing is a clever creation of the Florida Department of Health. Do us a favor and don't be the 5th Guy. And by the way, keep your hands out of your pants.

5th Guy, fifth guy, Florida, Florida Health Department, personal hygiene, superbugs, super germs, MRSA, hand washing

United States' Presidential Primary Dates

Confused about when U.S. states hold their presidential primaries? Go here to get a list of BOTH the republican and democratic parties' primary election schedules.

United States, presidential primary, primary dates, Iowa primary, New Hampshire, state primaries, Florida primary, Michigan primary, Nevada primary, primary election, presidential candidates, democrats, republicans, Hillary Clinton, U.S. election

Guy Fawkes Day - Nov. 5

The Clog Almanac wishes everyone a happy Guy Fawkes Day. Remember, remember, the 5th of November.

However, the world has had enough of folks blowing up stuff , themselves, and eachother, lately. Enough is enough.

Guy Fawkes, bomb plot, England, suicide attack, suicide bomber, terrorism, terrorist, Islamic militant

Got Mints? Must Watch Office Series Clip

Our clever friends at The Office gave us a prank that we're itching to try.



Using Pavlov's teaching theory, Jim teaches Dwight to want mints.

NBC, The Office, comedy, video clips, Altoids, mints, office pranks, Office series

Micro Wind Power

Check out this short video clip to see how easy and inexpensive it could be to produce electricity from wind on a small scale. This windbelt invention is lauded at ScribeMedia:

wind power, generator, electricity, wind, green electricity

A Very Clever Prank

Need to practice your German? Why not watch this very clever practical joke while you're at it?



Who said the Germans didn't have a sense of humor?
practical joke, learn German, pranks, jokes, Deutsch, comedy, twins

Little White Pill, Final Update

The little white pill that occupied an unswept landing in the stairwell of my office building for several weeks is no more.

The building's cleaning staff changed, and suddenly the pill was gone.
Gone, but not lost. The day after I noticed it missing and broke the news to colleagues, a group of us walking to lunch downtown found the pill where it had come to rest in a groove between two bricks of the new brick sidewalk that passes next to our building. I told them the whole boring story, which confirmed certain of their impressions of me - how many people do you know that monitor the life-spans and life-histories of items lost or discarded that persist in out-of-the-way nooks at their place of employment?

Our theory is this, and it is ours, and what it is is this: The new cleaning staff, being good new employees who hadn't yet found ways to shirk their after-hours time away like their recent predecessors, swept the little white pill down the stairwell and out the employees' entrance door at the base of the stairwell. They continued sweeping the small brick plaza just outside the door, until the sweepings met the nearby sidewalk. With a flick of the broom they propelled the sweepings, including the little white pill, westward down the sidewalk, out of their scope of work and responsibility, where the little white pill bounced and skidded for a few yards before coming to rest in the place at which it was eventually noticed by us.
That is our theory, and it is ours.

For two days the little white pill persisted in the chink of the brick walk, only to succumb to afternoon rains, during which time it was replaced in the stairwell by a green peanut m&m, whose stay lasted all of those 2 days. For all we know, the janitorial staff ate it. We have no theory about that.

Michael Vick Parodies

Michael Vick parody clips here, courtesy of the Campaign to Sack Michael Vick. You really should explore the site. There's much there to digest; to think about; to curse American professional sports about; to pray about; to wonder about the future of human history about; to speculate on the future of the United States about, and of course, to shake your head and laugh about.

Really, through it all (all those nasty charges), Michael Vick suddenly found religion? Please. Have a brain and turn your bald-faced lie meters up to "detect asshole" on this one. Trust me.

Michael Vick, Falcons, football, Atlanta, Atlanta Falcons, parody, pitbull, clown, sports, professional athlete, thug, thug life, thug army

China's Virtual Internet Police

Beijing police begin patrolling the internet today with virtual police men and women. View the image and newswire story here. Just a little scary, no?

China, Beijing, internet police, internet privacy

Alberto Gonzales - Resignation Letter

Here is an image of Alberto Gonzales' resignation letter. Who of us didn't see it coming?
What you really should be checking out is Former Attorney General John Ashcroft's recording history.

It's tough being the Atty General. You just might consider turning down the job - if you're ever offered it.

Alberto Gonzales, John Ashcroft, attorney general, recording, resignation letter, resign, music, singing senators, US, politics

Michael Vick Good as Unemployed

Michael Vick's atty's hinted he'd plead guilty to some charges surrounding the dog-fighting, cruelty, and conspiracy allegations that his good friends and cohorts have already turned state's evidence on with their plea deals. You might want to visit the Campaign to Sack Michael Vick, just to once again test the winds on the issues, whatever your sentiments.

The Clog Almanac advocates letting Vick plea to lesser charges by the federal authorities, thinking he'll be able, as one of the posts put it, to "Strut Training Camp Next Summer". Round 2 would be to allow South Carolina to pull the rug out from under him by later pressing state charges and try him for a longer list of crimes. Round 3 would be for the NFL to quietly ban him from their ranks. My employer would sack me and other little people (to paraphrase Leona Helmsley) and deny any vested pension benefits if convicted of the same list of state and federal crimes.

If anything, this whole affair puts other thug-athletes on notice that their anti-social behaviors and crimes will not go uninvestigated and unpunished. Go ahead, read the Code of Thug Life again.

Michael Vick, dog-fighting, pit bull, PETA, NFL, Atlanta Falcons, Atlanta, falcons, Leona Helmsley, little people, thug life, thug army, thug

The Other Side of the World

From the clever interactive Antipodes Map:

Tunnel down through Hawa'ii: You come out in Botswana, Brah...
Jacksonville, FL - sorry, you come out in the ocean way off Western Australia.
Anchorage? Somewhere in the Southern Ocean north of Antarctica - Sorry to break this news.
Hong Kong? You're gonna end up in Bolivia. I wouldn't have guessed, either.

antipodes, map, Jacksonville, Hawaii, Bolivia, southern ocean, Botswana, Antarctica

US-Israeli Military Aid Deal

The US stock market, beset by the widening fall-out of overextended American greed within the whole of the residential real estate investing/brokerage/financing market, has seen volatility this past two weeks that resembles a graph drawn by a cricket trying to stand on a hot backyard grill. At this point, the only thing keeping the market from plunging once-and-for-all into the depths of the Earth are near-daily infusions of capital by major banks and governmental agencies in several key countries.

Meanwhile, US-Israeli negotiations have warmed to the extent that the US Undersecretary of State (Nicholas Burns) has just signed a deal that pledges US$30 billion in military aid to Israel over the next 10 years. Consider this as a couple of 5-year plans from the near-finished Bush administration. What are they pledging to beef up Israel for? War with Iran? With Syria? With ________ (insert country here)? Are they hoping to provide Israel with deterrent arms that could be pressed into service if/when the US mounts a liberation/terrorist war against another Middle Eastern country?

Time will tell.

US-Israel, US, Israel, military aid, arms deal, liberation war, terror war, Middle East

Gator Hunt Opens Today

Dean became the first hurricane of the 2007 season early this a.m.

The first full day of the alligator hunting season opened today too. All 4500 permits were sold. Each permit holder is allowed to take 2 alligators.

How do you kill an alligator? Get your 2007 training manual here.

alligator, alligator hunt, harvest, training manual

Dean First Hurricane of 2007

Tropical Storm Dean has strengthened and so becomes the first hurricane of the 2007 season. Hurricane Dean is walking its way across the Atlantic at 18-20 mph and appears to be headed for the Yucatan. A National Weather Service posting indicates that an Air Force Reserve hurricane hunter aircraft will be dispatched this afternoon, and the NOAA will send its Gulfstream-IV on a surveillance mission.

You might want to bookmark this Google Earth site to track the storm's progress.

Hurricane Dean, hurricane, Dean, Atlantic